SALAS - After the silence

The secular world had taken hold of my life and everything it had to offer. I thought, “There’s no way I can go back to being Catholic now. I’m too far gone. He wouldn’t want me in my brokenness; the Church wouldn’t want me. What will people think?” I had just gone through a five-year separation from my Lord. My faith life had been the last thing on my mind the last few years of high school and into my early 20s. The devil does such a good job of making evil look appealing, but a beautiful glittery-wrapped box of rattlesnakes is still a box of rattlesnakes. 

As I entered my early 20s, I had a friend drag me to SEEK, a Catholic young adult conference. That weekend, surrounded by thousands of other young adults, I spent three consecutive hours on my knees in Adoration.

It was here that I came back to my Catholic faith, surrounded by others in their brokenness. I remember receiving the Sacrament of Confession for the first time in over half a decade, and I remember the priest rejoicing over my brutally honest confession. “Daughter, welcome home!” No shaming. No scolding. No judging. Just love.  

This priest made me feel God’s love and acceptance, which created a safe space for open conversation and, thus, allowed for a deeper conversion. It’s amazing how one person’s words and actions can affect you profoundly. If he had been harsh or condemning, all the spiritual gain from the weekend might have ended there. Instead, it was only the beginning. 
A lot of our teens have these “Prodigal Son” moments. They fall away from their faith only later, desiring to return but not knowing who to turn to for answers. As parents and grandparents, God gives us the opportunity to create a loving environment where our teens can come to us in their time of need. Imagine if, instead of waiting years to finally come back to God’s grace, teens had trusted adults they felt comfortable confiding in who could help lead them in the right direction.    

According to a 2020 Harvard study, 80% of teenagers said that family dinner is the time they’d most likely talk to their parents, yet only about 30% of families eat together regularly. 
So, parents and grandparents, I challenge you to give the teens in your life the gift of your time and your undivided attention. Start with weekly family dinners. 

Print out “100 Family Dinner Table Conversation Starters,” place all phones in another room, and start creating a space for your teens to have open and honest conversations with you. If you want to take it one step further, plan monthly or semi-monthly one-on-one date days. Let your teen pick something fun they want to do and join them. This will not only allow them to feel comfortable throughout your one-on-one time together but will help create an environment for them to open up to you about bigger issues in their life. 

You will be amazed at how this quality time will open the door to bigger conversations when the time is needed.

Kelly Reyes Salas is a parishioner at Sacred Heart of Jesus Catholic Church in Manvel.