KENNEPOHL: Anchoring the Family in Advent ... Intention, tradition and the waiting heart

Image CaptionAdvent always seems to sneak up on us. The calendar flips past Thanksgiving, and before we know it, Christmas lights are twinkling, and the noise of the season drowns out its quiet promise. As a parent, I’ve often wished I had more tools to help my children at each stage, especially teens, truly enter into Advent; not just wait for Christmas, but to prepare their hearts for it.  

Over the years, I’ve learned that preparations for Advent don’t have to require elaborate plans, just simple, intentional pauses that draw our families back to the infant Christ. 

Some of my most meaningful memories reach back to my own childhood. Each year, my mother and grandmother gathered us in the kitchen to bake Christmas cookies. We’d roll dough, sneak tastes and fill the air with flour and laughter. It wasn’t just baking, it was tradition, anticipation and togetherness.  

That time of waiting and watching cookies golden, with the sweet smell in the air, mirrored the spiritual waiting of Advent itself. Those hours around the kitchen table together taught us to make room for each other and the joyful coming of our Lord. I am so grateful to have such a loving mother who carried this tradition into her grandchildren’s lives today. Their laughter keeps hope alive in the tradition, and they look forward to it year after year. 

I also remember my father making time to climb into the attic after dinner to bring down the Christmas decorations. It wasn’t the lights or the ornaments that meant the most; it was the intentionality. What sweet memories with my mama hanging ornaments so delicately and us sisters dancing around to Christmas carols! As a child, that small act spoke louder than any perfectly dressed tree: love makes time for what matters. I’ve carried that lesson into parenthood: children don’t need perfection; they need our presence, our consistency and our willingness to pause with them. 

When my sisters and I were small, we’d lie on the floor under the sparkling tree lights, replaying the story of Jesus’ birth with our little nativity set or reading Christmas books together. Those moments of wonder taught us that tradition, intention and symbols are the holy reminders of hope and waiting for Jesus. 

When I first began setting an Advent wreath on our own kitchen table, my pre-teens and teens were less than enthused. Lighting candles and reading Scripture before dinner seemed like one more “mom thing.” But over time, it became a rhythm of our home. Now, they remind me when I forget to light the next candle. It’s a small thing, a circle of greenery and light, but it has become an anchor, marking time with purpose and drawing us closer to what the season is about: Christ’s coming into our everyday lives.  

If I could offer parents and grandparents a few tools to try at home with their youth, I would begin with the Advent wreath. Allow your children or teens to take the lead in lighting the candles and reading the Scripture each week. Giving them ownership of the prayer invites deeper connection and meaning. Another simple idea is a Reverse Advent Calendar: each day, add an item for donation to a local shelter or parish outreach. It’s a beautiful way to help young people link the season of waiting with the act of giving.  

Finally, create Silent Night moments: choose one evening a week to turn off screens, light candles and spend time together reflecting on where you’ve seen Christ’s presence throughout the week. These small, intentional practices can transform the home into a place of Advent peace and anticipation. 

Advent invites us to slow down to remember that God enters the ordinary. He comes to kitchens filled with laughter and cookies. He is amongst the dusty attic boxes. He is with us in the living room among the twinkling lights of the tree.  

When we make space through intention, tradition and prayer, our homes become small Nazareths: places where the Lord can once again be born among us.

Sarah Kennepohl is the junior high faith formation director at Mary Queen Catholic Church in Friendswood.